There are all sorts of things you have to do when you’re selling your home. In this modern Internet age, one of those things is putting photos of your house up on real estate agents’ websites. Now we’re not all professional photographers, but most of us can take a decent stab of capturing images of the rooms in our houses without making them look like a serial killer lives there. There are a few simple rules – don’t make the pictures creepy, don’t be hiding somewhere in the pictures, if the decor looks like an acid trip, paint the walls, don’t have a severed human head prominently on display on the kitchen table … that sort of thing. It’s easy when you think about it, and most people can just about manage to take decent photos that will help sell their house to others.
We said most people. That doesn’t mean all people …
Remember what we said about acid trips up there? This homeowner clearly has not followed that advice. There’s only one word to describe the decor in this room – monstrous.
Either the person who took this picture had the wrong setting set on their camera, or this bathroom is haunted by the evil ghost of a toilet.
Nice wash room leading out into a spacious garden there. I could definitely see myself living … wait, what? Who the hell’s that hiding behind the door? Run! Run away! AAAAAGH!
Nothing brings a main bedroom together quite like a toilet staring balefully out of the window. Very moody. Very … modern?
When you haven’t the room to sit under your table umbrella outside, why not bring it indoors where you can be shaded from the lightbulb in your kitchen.
Nothing entices potential buyers more than a photograph of the Amazon Rain Forest in the back yard of the house they’re thinking of buying. We wouldn’t be surprised to discover David Attenborough making a nature documentary in there!
Dead deer? Check. Dead fish? Check. Chillin’ monkey? Check. Quick sale? Er, maybe not.
The artwork really brings the room together. No, really. It’s lovely. Honestly.
“The house has a fully-fitted, spacious kitchen and dining area. The only problem is it’s attached the ceiling.”
For Sale: Cabin. Would suit diving enthusiasts, marine biologists and Aquaman.
They were clearly going for the whole ‘If you come take a look at the house, we WILL kill you’ vibe with this photo.
The trains are always watching. Watching, watching and waiting.
Nothing sells a room quite like a nice clean bathroom suite and a prominently-displayed firearm.
‘House includes fully fitted bathroom. Would suit sufferer of Inflammatory Bowel Disease.’
Nope. We don’t know what this all about.
Well if nothing else, it certainly provides a talking point!